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Somebody once told me
the orcs were gonna poke me
With their super red-hot brands
but they were looking kinda dumb
with their fingers and their thumbs
severed from the rest of their hands

Well, monsters start coming
and they don’t stop coming
lost our hit points
so we hit the ground running
Didn’t make sense to stay and fight
Our wounds would heal if we rest light

So much to do. So much XP
Do we level up? We’ll have to see
You never know if you don’t play
All you have to do is say

Hey now, we’re players, let’s RP, let’s game
Hey now, we’re DMs, tell a story, take aim
and all that glitters is gold
first just storm this dragon’s stronghold

It’s a cool game, and it only gets cooler
You hit all the mooks like they’re some preschoolers.
But this wizarding man begs to differ
judging by the hole he tore in the aether

The AC to hit is getting pretty high,
you better shield now, or you’re gonna die
my plane’s of fire
how about yours?
That’s the way I, and i’ll never get bored

Hey now, we’re players, let’s RP, let’s game
Hey now, we’re DMs, tell a story, take aim
and all that glitters is gold
first just storm this dragon’s stronghold

[musical interlude]

Somebody once asked if I could maybe cast
Dim door to help them get away from this place
I said yup, what a concept
I could use some teleporting myself
and we could use some more arcane

Well, monsters start coming
and they don’t stop coming
lost our hit points
so we hit the ground running
Didn’t make sense to stay and fight
Our wounds would heal if we rest light

So much to do. So much XP
Do we level up? We’ll have to see
You never know if you don’t play
All you have to do is say

Hey now, we’re players, let’s RP, let’s game
Hey now, we’re DMs, tell a story, take aim
and all that glitters is gold
first just storm this dragon’s stronghold

all that glitters is gold
first just storm this dragon’s stronghold

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Sailors of The Whiskey Jack aburras